Yesterday, a girl in my year at school Hannah, died of cancer. I didn't know her personally, but the impact of the loss has been felt by everyone in our school community. She'd been bravely battling it for over 3 years and I was always in awe of her inspiring strength, determination, bravery and unfaltering positivity in the face of such adversity. She refused to let the disease get the better of her and came to school, with a permenant smile on her face whenever she was physically well enough. I'm not sure I would have been able to do the same if the tables had been turned.
Anyone who has ever lost someone, especially to dieseases like cancer knows how hard it is but the younger the person is when they die, the sadder it is for those left behind. Hannah was seventeen. We are all just on the brink of starting our lives and I can't help but think about all the experiences were are going to have that she never will; university, making friends, falling in love, getting a job, getting married, having kids. We will all grow older but she'll stay seventeen forever. It just doesn't seem fair.
Like I said, she wasn't my friend so I am not grieving but I am extremely saddened. The only good thing about death, if you can call it that, is that you are forced to put everything into perspective. It makes you realise how short and precious life is, how much you take for granted, how pathetic and trivial your problems are compared to some people's and question your own life.
I guess I wanted to write this post not to be morbid and make you feel depressed, negative and hopeless but completely the opposite. I wanted to give you hope and to want to make the most of your lives. I wanted to share with you a few of the momumental realisations I have come to over the past couple of years and especially in the last few days.
Cherish every moment you spend with your loved ones. Make time for the people you care about. Sing, dance, laugh, hug, smile as often as you can; make as many memories as possible. Stop talking about things and just do them. "One day" may never arrive. Make sure that at the end of your life, whenever that may be, you have as few regrets as possible. Make sure there aren't things you wished you'd done or said. Life is far too short to do things you hate. If something makes you unhappy, stop it. It really is that simple. Don't spend 30 years in a job you hate or 15 years in a stifling relationship. Be happy because you deserve to be.
Most importantly, it can be easy to feel guilty that you are alive and they aren't but that is not only not your fault and not changing anything but it's not true. No one understands why some people die how and when they do, it's one of life's great mysteries which depends on what, if anything, you believe. What you do know for sure is that you are alive. It may not feel like it at times but for whatever reason, you have been given the gift of life. Don't waste it. You owe it to all of those who have died to live your life to the full and do all the things that they no longer can.
I will be back to my happy super chic, fashion-obssessed self in the next post I promise, I just felt it was neccessary to do this post.
Stay safe and chic mes chéries,
English Rose x